Friday's Top Ten
Top ten signs you might need a beer:
10. You're late to pick up kids from school, back out of your driveway, and knock over your fully loaded trashcan that still hasn't been picked up.
9. The trashcan falls on the neighbor's cat.
8. The cat screeches and flies into the street in front of the neighbor's car.
7. The neighbor swerves to avoid her cat and hits the streetlight pole.
6. The streetlight falls onto the fire hydrant and opens the valve.
5. Water fountains from the hydrant onto the cat, who's busy inspecting the spilled trash, and pushes the cat into the street. Again.
4. The neighbor gets out of her car, tries to catch her cat, and slips on the wet pavement - right in front of the teenager from the next block who thinks he's Jimmie Johnson and Helio Castroneves rolled into one.
3. The teenager slams on his brakes, slides into the trashcan (sending it flying into the air), up onto the sidewalk, and comes to a stop in your yard - inches from a massive oak.
2. While you're gawking at the teen, the trash can plummets to earth upside down and lands on top of you, knocking you to the ground.
And the #1 reason you might need a beer:
1. Your cell rings. It's your husband. "Hey, I'm bringing my boss home for dinner. Can you make lasagne?"
10. You're late to pick up kids from school, back out of your driveway, and knock over your fully loaded trashcan that still hasn't been picked up.
9. The trashcan falls on the neighbor's cat.
8. The cat screeches and flies into the street in front of the neighbor's car.
7. The neighbor swerves to avoid her cat and hits the streetlight pole.
6. The streetlight falls onto the fire hydrant and opens the valve.
5. Water fountains from the hydrant onto the cat, who's busy inspecting the spilled trash, and pushes the cat into the street. Again.
4. The neighbor gets out of her car, tries to catch her cat, and slips on the wet pavement - right in front of the teenager from the next block who thinks he's Jimmie Johnson and Helio Castroneves rolled into one.
3. The teenager slams on his brakes, slides into the trashcan (sending it flying into the air), up onto the sidewalk, and comes to a stop in your yard - inches from a massive oak.
2. While you're gawking at the teen, the trash can plummets to earth upside down and lands on top of you, knocking you to the ground.
And the #1 reason you might need a beer:
1. Your cell rings. It's your husband. "Hey, I'm bringing my boss home for dinner. Can you make lasagne?"
Comments
Mason
Thoughts in Progress
Joanne - I've never experienced this EXACT sequence of events.
Jane - But I have had days that ramped up from one unbelievable event to another, each one more outrageous.
I think I'd skip the beer and go back to bed, tell my husband I'm deathly ill and take the boss out to dinner.
But if I may have a Pina Colada??????
Lee
Tossing It Out
Shirley - Love the smell of pina coladas but they're way too sweet for me. I'll stick with beer or very dry wine. You can have all the pina coladas you want!
Arlee - Dominos & Drambuie ... what a combo :)
And I have a little surprise for you today!
I loved reading this. The really funny thing is that you could just see anyone of those things happening and leading to the next one.
Elspeth - Thanks!
Cassandra - Glad you enjoyed the post.
Teresa - Me, too :)
Maryann - I'd never hurt a cat or dog or anything else. Except maybe a spider or mosquito.
I hope the only thing that happened to you, if any, was number one. :)