Friday's Top Ten

Top ten things to mention in your query:

10. All your friends love your story.

  9. Your story will be the next mega bestseller.

  8. Your story combines the best of Rowling, Brown, Patterson, and Meyer.

  7. The protagonist is perfection.

  6. The antagonist is evil incarnated.

  5. The names of your children and/or pets.

  4. What you did on your last vacation.

  3. You're certain the agent will be a perfect match for you because both of you loved Avatar.

  2. You've made a collage of the agent's photos collected from the internet.

And the #1 thing to mention in your query:

  1. I'll call you tomorrow to make sure you received my query.

Shared with tongue firmly in cheek :)

Comments

Mason Canyon saidā€¦
Always love your Friday's Top Ten list. I'd say #1 hits the spot.

Mason
Thoughts in Progress
Alex J. Cavanaugh saidā€¦
If that worked, I'd try it!
Joanne saidā€¦
I wonder how many of these things agents do actually see, and how often! Happy Friday to you.
Carol Kilgore saidā€¦
Mason - Thanks. Just what agents want to read, right?

Alex - Me, too :)

Joanne - Imagine they see these kinds of things way more than they'd like to. Happy Friday back!
Ann Best saidā€¦
Irony is a very effective tool. Thanks for making me chuckle on a Friday that's actually sunny (here) for a change. Reading through this just added to my enjoyment.
Aubrie saidā€¦
This is my favorite list! I have all of those things in my query and a bribe with cookies as well :)
Karen Jones Gowen saidā€¦
Best post of the day BY FAR!!!
Carol Kilgore saidā€¦
Ann - Enjoy the sun!

Aubrie - Good for you - especially the cookies - LOL!

Karen - Thank you. I'm humbled.

Elana - Thanks!
Helen Ginger saidā€¦
Well, crapiola, can I un-send an email that was sent a week ago? Awh, man, I mass-sent it to 52 agents, too.

Helen
Straight From Hel
Conda Douglas saidā€¦
Ha! And Helen--just start calling the agent's home phone numbers...
Anonymous saidā€¦
I'm sure that adding the names of your children and pets would just clinch it.

Thanks for making us smile.
Carol Kilgore saidā€¦
Helen - Of course ... mass-send that sucker!

Conda - Good! Go straight for the home phone, not the office one.

Cassandra - Yep! You're welcome.
Laura Eno saidā€¦
Hilarious list - too bad some people actually do those things!
kanishk saidā€¦
I wonder how many of these things agents do actually see, and how often
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Talli Roland saidā€¦
Hahaha! Love this! Of course you need to call to follow-up... yeah, right. Hope you're having a great weekend.
Shirley saidā€¦
I'm always a day late on the Friday Top Tens, but I still look for it. This one is adorable!
Carol Kilgore saidā€¦
Thanks, Teresa.

Shirley, whenever you read is fine. I'm happy whenever you visit.

Talli, follow-up is always important - LOL.

I'm guessing a lot of people do one or more of these things, Laura. Some because they believe the guidelines don't apply to them and some out of ignorance because they haven't researched how to write a query.

Thanks to everyone for commenting.
Elspeth Futcher saidā€¦
How did you know exactly what I'd plan to write in my query letter? Spooky. Another winning top 10 Carol! I love these!
Carol Kilgore saidā€¦
Cue the Twilight Zone theme - LOL
Thanks.

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